Buffy (to random vamp she's fighting): You know very well, you eat this late... (stakes him)... you're gonna get heartburn. Get it? Heartburn? (He turns to dust) That's it? That's all I get? One lame-ass vamp with no appreciation for my painstakingly thought out puns. I don't think the forces of darkness are even trying.

Spike (to Buffy behind her back, out of earshot): Watch your mouth, little girl. You should know better than to tempt the Fates that way. 'Cause the Big Bad is back, and this time it's... varghhhhh! (As he's being shocked with a taser.)

Willow: 'Cause The Bronze is nice and familiar. It's like a big comfy blanky.
Oz: I was under the impression that I was your big comfy blanky.
Willow: Ahhh, you're my person blanky; this is my place blanky.

Giles (appearing for a social visit at The Bronze): Hello.
Buffy: Giles, trouble?

Giles: Don't look at me that way. I'm down with the new music.

Willow (to Buffy): You made me jealous of you academically! Buffy! (They hug.)

Buffy: She wants me to lead a discussion group next class. That means more work right? Shouldn't she have a better reward system, you know, like a cookie, or a toy surprise like at the dentist?

Willow: How come you didn't tell me I look like a crazy birthday cake in this shirt?
Buffy: I thought that was the point.

Willow: I have wrong feelings about other guys sometimes, but I feel guilty and I flog and punish.
Buffy: Exactly. I'm sure Oz is flogging and punishing himself... this is sounding wrong before I even finish.

Oz: I'm only a wolf three nights a month.
Veruca: Or you're the wolf all the time and this human face is just your disguise.

Giles: You came on business, I hope?
Buffy: Yes. Lucky for you, people may be in danger.

Xander: I suspect she's afraid I'll start having the sex.

Willow: I need a translator from the 'Y' side of things.
Xander: Well, last time I checked, I had the creds.

Willow: What if the girl wants to, and the guy doesn't? That's a bad sign, right?
Xander: Could be. Or the girl caught the guy in one of the seven annual minutes he is legitimately too preoccupied to... do it.

Buffy: Oz, you OK? I mean, if it's possible, you seem more monosyllabic than usual.

Oz: Look, Buffy, you should know that, that —
Buffy: Oz, now might be a good time for your trademark stoicism.

Oz: Veruca was right about something. The wolf is inside me all the time, and I don't know where that line is anymore between me and it. And until I figure out what that means, I shouldn't be around you, or anybody.
Willow: Well, that could be a problem, 'cause people... kind of a planetary epidemic.

Willow: Oz, don't you love me?
Oz: My whole life I've never loved anything else.