The Kinitawowi & Bally Show, episode 26
Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 9:18 am
Wow, it's been an incredibly long time since the last one of these. 
We'd like to apologise to our fans for that. Sorry, Amanda. 
This episode features Amanda herself - making her K&B début, no less - and the last sketch recorded in Dave's flat. It's a milestone.
*opening credits*
K: No good food begins with "re".
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 28/3/08*
---
*having watched a trailer for the ITV programme Beat The Star, in which a member of the public competes against a celebrity over some mental and physical challenges, the tagline for which is "The loser of this is going to be gutted"*
B: "The loser of this is going to be gutted". And that's it.
K: Yes.
*pause*
K: Unless they mean literally gutted.
*Recorded at K's flat, Manchester, 19/4/08*
---
*K&B arrive back after a small shopping run*
K: An hour and a quarter. [until Doctor Who] What do you plan to do?
B: [brandishes razor] I plan to remove parts of my face that are no longer necessary.
K: Good luck with that.
B: [going upstairs] Thanks. I'll probably come back down covered in blood.
K: That's usually the sign of a shitty razor.
B: Or the sign of a shitty face.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 17/5/08*
---
K: I won't be watching any of it. [Euro 2008] You can watch France vs. Italy if you like - I'll be using that time to go upstairs and download porn.
*Recorded at B's house, 28/5/08*
---
*K&B are talking fanfic*
B: If you wrote plausible fanfic, you'd be a writer.
*pause*
B: We watch[i/] plausible fanfic.
K: It's called Torchwood.
*Recorded in Hartshill, Stoke-on-Trent, 15/6/08*
---
CA: I think there going to do his [Tony Stark's] alcoholism next film.
B: [in trailer voiceover voice] Iron Man: DRINK!
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 21/6/08*
---
K: The slogan for the Olympics is "One World, One Dream".
*pause*
K: You can't help but add "One Party" to the end.
*Recorded in B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 6/8/08*
---
K: What's the line? "Lynx: the smell of cheap teenage desperation".
*pause*
B: Don't you wear Lynx?
K: Yes.
*pause*
K: When I remember.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 13/8/08*
---
*K's computer is on the blink*
K: I've been recommended a program called "MOBOMON".
B: MOBOMON?
K: MOBOMON. It's short for "Mother Board Monitor". It should give me a more accurate measurement of the CPU's temperature.
B: Right.
*pause*
B: So it's not a device to tell you how Usher and Jamelia are doing in the charts?
K: No.
*pause*
B: That gag was either going to go down really well, or not.
K: You say that like it was ever a choice.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 25/8/08*
We'd like to apologise to our fans for that. Sorry, Amanda. This episode features Amanda herself - making her K&B début, no less - and the last sketch recorded in Dave's flat. It's a milestone.
*opening credits*
K: No good food begins with "re".
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 28/3/08*
---
*having watched a trailer for the ITV programme Beat The Star, in which a member of the public competes against a celebrity over some mental and physical challenges, the tagline for which is "The loser of this is going to be gutted"*
B: "The loser of this is going to be gutted". And that's it.
K: Yes.
*pause*
K: Unless they mean literally gutted.
*Recorded at K's flat, Manchester, 19/4/08*
---
*K&B arrive back after a small shopping run*
K: An hour and a quarter. [until Doctor Who] What do you plan to do?
B: [brandishes razor] I plan to remove parts of my face that are no longer necessary.
K: Good luck with that.
B: [going upstairs] Thanks. I'll probably come back down covered in blood.
K: That's usually the sign of a shitty razor.
B: Or the sign of a shitty face.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 17/5/08*
---
K: I won't be watching any of it. [Euro 2008] You can watch France vs. Italy if you like - I'll be using that time to go upstairs and download porn.
*Recorded at B's house, 28/5/08*
---
*K&B are talking fanfic*
B: If you wrote plausible fanfic, you'd be a writer.
*pause*
B: We watch[i/] plausible fanfic.
K: It's called Torchwood.
*Recorded in Hartshill, Stoke-on-Trent, 15/6/08*
---
CA: I think there going to do his [Tony Stark's] alcoholism next film.
B: [in trailer voiceover voice] Iron Man: DRINK!
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 21/6/08*
---
K: The slogan for the Olympics is "One World, One Dream".
*pause*
K: You can't help but add "One Party" to the end.
*Recorded in B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 6/8/08*
---
K: What's the line? "Lynx: the smell of cheap teenage desperation".
*pause*
B: Don't you wear Lynx?
K: Yes.
*pause*
K: When I remember.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 13/8/08*
---
*K's computer is on the blink*
K: I've been recommended a program called "MOBOMON".
B: MOBOMON?
K: MOBOMON. It's short for "Mother Board Monitor". It should give me a more accurate measurement of the CPU's temperature.
B: Right.
*pause*
B: So it's not a device to tell you how Usher and Jamelia are doing in the charts?
K: No.
*pause*
B: That gag was either going to go down really well, or not.
K: You say that like it was ever a choice.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 25/8/08*
Curses.